Christmas 2010

We had a wonderful Christmas this year.  We spent time with all of our family and friends.  I went into the week of Christmas feeling pretty down but as Christmas eve arrived and we made our first stop at my Dad's house it was very clear to me how much our kids are loved by everyone around us and my mood shifted.  It was very evident that all of our family and friends have a deep, unconditional love for Dylan.  They always want to make sure they give him that extra hug and kiss and let me know how much they are praying for him everyday.  Wanted to let you all know that it really means a lot to me, thank you so much for caring.

Peek-a-boo

Dylan and Hailey playing the piano with Uncle Chad.

Our little chubby reindeer.

My handsome boys.

Dylan mostly enjoyed ripping the wrapping paper and playing with the bows.

Dylan walking with some help from Grandma.  Right before this picture he had just done two consecutive rolls to get to his new toy!  This was the first time he has ever rolled more than once at a time.  It was very exciting, my mom and I screamed "DID YOU SEE THAT, HE ROLLED TWICE!"

Luke and Daddy tuckered out after a long, fun Christmas.

Heaven's Very Special Child

Heaven's Very Special Child

A meeting was held quite far from Earth

"It's time again for another birth"

Said the Angels to the Lord above

This special child will need much love

His progress may seem very slow

Accomplishments he may not show

And he'll require extra care

From folks he meets, way down there

He may not run, laugh, or play

His thoughts may seem quite far away

So many times he will be labeled different,

helpless and disabled

So let's be careful where he's sent

We want his life to be content;

Please Lord find the parents who

will do a special job for you

They will not realize right away

The leading role they're asked to play

So with this child sent from above

Comes stronger faith and a richer love

And soon they'll know the privilege given

In caring for their gift from Heaven

This special child so meek and mild

Is "Heaven's Very Special Child."

- Unknown author

I have read this poem many times before and thought I would post it.  I have had some sad last few days, don't ask me why because I don't really know.  Maybe it is because Luke is already bearing weight on his legs and has head control at 6 weeks and it seems that Dylan just started doing that.  Or maybe because Hailey has begun asking more questions about Dylan lately.  For instance, "Mommy, why can't Dylan talk or walk yet?"  and "Why is baby Luke growing so fast and Dylan is growing so slow?"  My response has been that God made Dylan extra special and it is going to take him a little longer to do some things and it is going to take him a little longer to grow. 

I have been thinking about the future, and the truth is it really scares me.  I have also been thinking a lot of what life would have been like if Dylan was born with all of his chromosomes intact.  I even had to bite my lip to keep from full-on crying when I was in the checkout line at Walmart on Friday because I saw a little boy about Dylan's age running down the aisle.  I know that it is probably not helping me to have these thoughts but I can't seem to control it.  I am a pro at the art of smiling and laughing on the outside but screaming on the inside.  Unless I tell someone that something is wrong they usually won't know it.  So last night I went on an Internet search to look for some inspirational quotes or poems for parents of children with special needs and I came across this:

Everyday brings us unique challenges that can wear us down or build us up.

For within each day:

• We may have every strength and weakness of our own tested
• We will have to fight and advocate for our children
• We will choose to protect our integrity and theirs
• We will stand firm amongst criticism and in our beliefs
• We can choose to embrace their uniqueness
• We will love them with every part of our being
• We can find renewed hope and strength
• We can find peace and love where there may have not otherwise been
• We may cry, grieve, and mourn what we cannot, or do not have
• Yet, we can choose to celebrate, value and appreciate what we do

We face life with an incredible amount of strength and courage.  We count our blessings, we realize the frailty and preciousness of life, we find wings we may have never had, and we, in the end, inspire others and show our children amazing and unconditional love.  We climb a tough mountain, but the steeper it is and the more hurdles we encounter on the way, the more we appreciate the view from the top.  We have seen and learned things most people don't get a chance to.  We value differences, validate each other and know a love and appreciation deeper than most.

I think this hits how I feel right on the nose. 

Then no matter how sad I am or how much I am crying I take one look at this precious face and my heart melts and I can't help but smile.

One Year Anniversary of the Blog

I am a little late (Nov.18th would have been the exact anniversary) but I have been a little busy. 

Has it really been one year since I started blogging?  It has gone by fast. So much has happened that I can't believe it has only been one year.  Dylan has been through two surgeries, a broken leg, a seizure, numerous therapies and appointments.  We bought a new house, moved, had to change doctors and therapists, we even had another baby.  We thought that we weren't busy enough so why not add another one into the mix. :)

I have been asked by some, "why do you blog?"  Well, a little over one year ago I came across a blog about Norrah, a beautiful little girl who, like Dylan, also has WHS.  I read through her blog and saw a very happy family.  I looked at their pictures and read their stories and said to myself "I can make it through this." I was so inspired by her mother Lauren, the author of the blog, that I thought maybe I should blog too.  Blogging has been very therapeutic for me.  You see, after Dylan was born my life felt like it had been turned completely upside down.  I felt like no one understood how I felt, but I was able to sit at the computer and write about anything, anything at all and there was no one to tell me to just "get over it" or "stop feeling sorry for myself."  I had so many deep thoughts, feelings, pain and emotions that I figured maybe I should write it all down and what better place than a blog. 

Through blogging I have found great support from total strangers, who have become dear friends to me.  We share our children's accomplishments, joys and challenges.  These fellow moms have helped me get over the hump.  They have given me inspiration not only for Dylan but for myself.  I am motivated and inspired by these wonderful women who are happy, grateful and living their lives to the fullest.  I strive to be like them.  Some days are harder than others but I am getting there. 

I came home from dinner last night with friends and looked around at my house, my family, my life and had an overwhelming feeling of gratefulness.  I am so very blessed.  Thank you all for reading and commenting. 

Lets take a trip down memory lane:

Growing up

Dylan is getting so big and looking less and less like a baby.  Just a few weeks ago I was saying how small Dylan was and now he looks huge and feels like a ton of bricks!  He is definetely the BIG BROTHER in the house and is showing us everyday all the great new things he can do. 

Today was Luke's actual due date.  I can't believe that he is now one month old!